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Sunday, December 13, 2015

no bench-warmer husband or husband-in-waiting

Maybe it's one of those days you want to punch your husband in the face. My dear, don't. Give me a few minutes to try to convince you not to (I might just save his good looks).

I found myself in the same boat recently. I was doing what no good wife should do and remembering all of the things Yeng's done wrong. I got so worked up I was ready to beat the crap out of him. I bit my tongue, though, and told the Spirit if He wanted to stop me He'd better go and do it now before it was too late.

He did (I should have known better: He always does). He gave me one good reason not to, not that day and not ever.

Yeng is all I have. I've got no bench-warmer husband or husband-in-waiting. There's only one person whom I can say has to get through this crazy life with me--and that's Yeng.

Floating or sinking,
Broken or whole,
Sunshine or rain--

Yeng and I are in life together. Forever. If we aren't looking out for one another, then we've got no one to look out for us, because, as far as I know, nobody else signed that marriage covenant.

He's got me and I've got him--and we are all we have.

My dear, we may not be great lovers, but somewhere along the way we found someone we wanted to learn to love well. Then we dug up the courage to commit to it for the rest of our lives.

The precious part? That someone loved us enough to do the same.

If you haven't already, kick those young love fantasies out of your head. They don't belong there. They don't do you any good. You are meant for more than young love.

You are meant for deep love. The kind of love that reaches into the soul, down into the ugly mess, so that it can embrace it all. The kind of love that comes from blood, sweat and tears. From living paycheck to paycheck together. From surviving endless nights together. From togetherness.

Two shall become one. You and your beloved are the two. Everything else driving you crazy is the becoming one. Let no man (or you, my dear) separate that sacred unity.

Keep loving strong. Your beloved is worth the fight. Your marriage is worth the fight.

with much love,