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Wednesday, November 18, 2015

heart of jonah

I knew I knew better. But I didn't want to be the bigger person. Taking the higher road is unpleasant; it's so sacrificial. It meant I had to mature even when others didn't.

It was bad enough I knew in my heart that my insecurities were keeping me from God's will, but it wasn't bad enough to bring me to the foot of the cross. You know how that goes.

But God wouldn't have any of that (you know how that goes!).


I finally found the courage to admit to my sisters what I was wrestling with. I felt so ugly confessing it. Filled with shame. Filled with disgust. But I knew the kind of cleansing it would take to redeem me, and it could only come from their accountability.

They threw me over the boat. They dragged me out from where I was cowering in fear of the truth and hurled me into the sea. As I hit the waves, I cried. Out of frustration, out of relief.


Sitting here in the belly of the fish has been cleansing. The entire second chapter of Jonah is a prayer from Jonah to God, and now I understand a little better why. There's a heart change that needs to happen before real growth begins, and it starts with an honest heart-to-heart with our Creator.
Becoming more like Jesus frees us from all insecurities, doubts, and addictions. [tweet]
Currently sitting in the belly of fish? It's definitely more unpleasant than it sounds.

Getting tired of being here yet? Friends, this is probably one of the few situations where the cliche is actually true: The grass is greener on the other side.

Getting to the other side, however, is a walk through crab grass overrun with fire ants.

The only way out of this wilderness, this belly of a fish, is through Jesus. Through an honest relationship with Jesus in which becoming more like Him frees us from insecurities, doubts, and addictions. That's life to the full, friends, a life I want for myself and you.


If you haven't already, find those dear friends who'll lovingly chuck you overboard for the sake of sanctification. Get swallowed whole by that dreaded fish. Sit in its belly and have a heart-to-heart with Jesus while you wait to get spat up.

When you do get spat up (it'll happen, give or take a few seasons), do one better than Jonah and get going to your Nineveh a changed person. Seize your abundant life by the scales.

"Sow righteousness for yourselves,
reap the fruit of unfailing love,
and break up your unplowed ground;
for it is time to seek the Lord,
until He comes and showers His righteousness on you." (Hosea 10:12)

we're in this together,